September 18, 2015 - Jumping off the Barn Happy Fun Time Show!

JoshandNathanThis show came along following the End Of Summer Metal Meltdown in Clyde, NY. Happy to say it was a solid event, with a great turnout, which really comes as no surprise, considering the fan base in our area. Always good to see people coming together to support local music!

Josh and I had been sharing out some Archway cookies on this evening, although Nathan seemed to be feeling guilty about indulging himself. Honestly, considering that he weighs less than 50 pounds and could potentially get blown all the way to Oz in a stiff breeze, I don't think a few cookies were going to really be a problem for our Brony friend. Joe did take a bit of offense when Nathan started eyeing his cherry pie, even making the obvious Warrant reference. Joe wasn't havin' it, though, and suggested that perhaps Nathan could eat the it turns out, this was likely one of the dirtiest double-entendres in Metallic Onslaught history. Pretty sure none of us have a problem eating the box, Joe!

We were actually a little concerned about Nathan's well-being, considering all the damage he'd been put through in recent weeks. I mean, between getting Spanky's horn rammed up his ass (yes, it's confirmed, that horn went straight into the ol' starfish...), and then all the punishment we'd dealt him the prior week, well, it's only natural that the guy may not have been feeling up to snuff. I think we all felt bad for an entire two minutes, and then got on with the show...

Somehow Babymetal got mentioned, and we were reminded that Joe has still not been exposed to them. Luckily, Josh is almost never without his laptop, so we found some YouTube content. Sadly, the video just sat there buffering, so Joe was unable to take in said YouTube content. Which is a shame, because love 'em or hate 'em, you really need to see it to fully appreciate it.

Azkath had gotten it into his head that I would show my skills as a stuntman on this evening by throwing myself off the top of the barn. As a matter of fact, the way he put it was that we were going to have "Shove-You-Off-The-Roof-Happy-Fun-Time". I think it should go without saying that I wasn't buying it for a second. Oddly enough, and I don't remember how this happened, I ended up taking a warm-up plunge from the roof of our current recording space. I believe I ended up landing on a metal table, and was pretty sure I'd broken a number of bones. In fact, my right arm in particular seemed to have been damaged horrifically...yet I was in no pain. In fact, it was only a short time before it seemed like the arm was completely healed! Weird how that happens...but not as weird as Azkath's suggestion that perhaps the pain was a figment of my imagination. He, in fact, went so far as to suggest that perhaps they were all figments of my imagination...which is just silly...

As for the barn, I swore up and down all night that there was going to be absolutely NO jumping off. I mean, not only is it one hell of a climb to the top of that damned thing, but there are also numerous coyotes roaming about Azkath's domain, and rumor has it that they've somehow been acquiring meth. Now, I don't know about you, but climbing to the top of a barn while meth coyotes are nipping at my heels is NOT my idea of a good time! And this is where I things get weird again...I have vague memories of being on top of the barn, but no idea how I got up there. Thankfully, I don't remember seeing any meth coyotes...yet, I do seem to remember falling and hitting some steps...and then...nothing...

Yet, here I am, typing this recap, so maybe it really was all a figment of my imagination!

- Metal Wulf


Atreyu - Long Live
Tsar Bomb - ...and Spill Thy Fire Upon The Earth
Reflections - Sadist

Slayer - Pride In Prejudice
Gama Bomb - Tuck Your T-Shirt In
Denner/Shermann - Seven Skulls
Metal Allegiance - Gift Of Pain
Malevolent Creation - Resistance Is Victory

Marvel - L.O.V.E. Machine
Deadheads - The Horror
Gloryhammer - Legend Of The Astral Hammer
Stratovarius - Rise Above It
W.A.S.P. - Scream

Saxon - Battering Ram
Queensryche - Arrow Of Time
Metal Church - Badlands (2015)
Deceased - Blower
Huntress - Noble Savage

Voodoo Hill - Rattle Shake Bone
Ghost Ship Octavius - Bloodcaster
Antropofago - God Ov Fire
The Negation - Visions Of Doom
Heart Of A Coward - Grain Of Sand
Defeater - December 1943

Ambush - Possessed By Evil
Windhand - Two Urns
Masters Of Metal - Into The Vortex
Harlott - Systematic Reduction

Christian Mistress - No Place
Housebreaking - Blood Red
Iron Maiden - The Man Of Sorrows
Seven Witches - Better Daze
Nile - To Walk Forth From Flames Unscathed

Aftermath - Words That Echo Fear
Whitesnake - Rough An' Ready
Rough Cutt - Cutt Your Heart Out
Onslaught - Shellshock
Nuclear Assault - Stranded In Hell
Nuclear Assault - Mother's Day

Gutted Alive - Gorging On Gray Matter
Cattle Decapitation - Not Suitable For Life
Sirens And Sailors - Rising Moon : Setting Sun
Million Miles From Broadway - Break Away
Amorphis - Enemy At The Gates

De Profundis - In Solitude
Hammercult - Let It Roar
Diemonds - Meet Your Maker
Motorhead - Choking On Your Screams
Uncle Acid And The Deadbeats - Downtown

Once Human - Pick Your Poison
Kobra And The Lotus - Lay It On The Line
Ghost - From The Pinnacle To The Pit
The Sword - High Country
Wolfheart - Last Of All Winters

Parkway Drive - Crushed
Graveyard - The Apple And The Tree
He Whose Ox is Gored "Oathbreaker"
Wailin' Storms "Shiver, Shiver, Shiver"

The Grasshopper Lies Heavy "Red After Image"