November 14, 2014 - Randy Goes Through a Table

Recap by The Metal Wulf

Strange things were happening on this night, and for once I wasn't responsible for the majority of it.

Truth of the matter is, I'm not even sure if I should mention some of this in the recap, not knowing how much damage it could do to our long-suffering host.

Awwww, screw it...

Fact is, Joe thought he was King Diamond for most of the night. It all started when we played a track from the new 2-disc "best of" collection. It was really puzzling, because we honestly thought Joe was horsing around at first, but it soon became apparent that the guy wasn't fuckin' around.

He REALLY thought he was King Diamond...and even went so far as to mention a time when he was supposed to have been interviewed by Joe many years ago, but backed out on him!

How can I best put this into perspective?

Let's put it this way, even Azkath was completely perplexed, and you know it's gotta be pretty serious when he's scratching his head over something.

He was so frustrated by the whole thing that he actually had to step out for a bit!

The fact that Josh thought it was real didn't help matters at all. He honestly believed that Joe was King Diamond!

As a matter of fact, Joe kept referring to Josh as one of his "Black Horsemen". Even an intervention from Jeffie didn't make a difference! Any attempts that Jeffie made at knocking some sense into Joe failed, as Josh seemed to be absorbing all of the damage dealt to Joe.

Even from the other side of the room!

EVEN AFTER JEFFIE DUCT-TAPED JOSH TO A CHAIR!!!!!

Madness, I tell you! Pure madness!

There was ONE talk break where Joe briefly came back to us, and that was when Azkath said it was time to put me through the table.

Yeah, that was real by the way, I promise that wasn't just some clever editing work using some cool, crunching sound effects. The video is very much available for your visual consumption, and has even been shared on Facebook on more than a couple of pages. Pretty easy to find, if you'd like to see it!

Yep, I begged, I pleaded, I tried to convince them that it was totally unneccessary to "reward" me in that manner for quitting smoking.(Fact: It was my punishment for picking up the habit again in the first place! I think the "reward" was not using fire, thumbtacks, flourescent light tubes, or barbed wire in conjunction with the table...)

But, I took the damage, and also got a bit of a bonus beatdown as I lay amongst the ruined table.

The important part is, I'm fine now and looking forward to NOT EVER having to do that again!

Playlist

Kiss "I Stole Your Love"
Riot "Thundersteel (live)"
King Diamond "Black Horseman"

Ire Clad "Feeds on Them"
The Skull "Sends Judas Down"
Blue Snaggletooth "Nameless Cults"
Arcane "Enshrouded Crypt"
Downfall of Gaia "Of Stillness and Solitude"