June 22, 2013 - Joe's Birthday

  • Published in 2013
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Dio - Fever Dreams
Queens of The Stone Age - I Sat By The Ocean
Jorn - I Came To Rock
Moon Curse - Black Elk

Metallica - Trapped Under Ice
Havok - Worse Than War
Darkane - Collapse Of Illusions
Brutus - Square Headed Dog
Amon Amarth - We Shall Destroy
Kalmah - Pikemaster

Extol - Behold The Sun
The Black Dahlia Murder - Phantom Limb Masterbation
Alice In Chains - Lab Monkey
Huntress - Destroy Your Life
Dream Death - Bludgeon

Wolf - A Dangerous Meeting
Scorpion Child - Salvation Slave
August Burns Red - Count It All As Lost
Anger As Art - Speed Kills

Satan - Time To Die
Into The Flood - Sufferer
Children of Bodom - Damaged Beyond Repair
A Pale Horse Named Death - The Needle In You
Evile - Skull
Anvil - Call Of Duty
The Quill - Freak Parade

Spirits Of The Dead - Song Of Many Reefs
Mumakil - Fresh Meat For The Grinder
King Kobra - The Crunch
Battlecross - Wage A War
Gutted - Collector Of Souls
Beyond Creation - Omnipresent Perception

White Wizzard - Kings Of The Highway
Queensryche - X2
Queensryche - Where Dreams Go To Die
Zed - Settle The Score
Megadeth - Kingmaker
Demon Lung - Eyes Of Zamiel

Pasadena Napalm Division - 100 Beers With A Zombie
Svartcrown - Genesis Architect
Colossus - Beacons
Disfigured Dead - Deranged Concecration
Yellowtooth - '75 Black Pontiac
Venomous Maximus - Father Time
Venomous Maximus - Dream Again

Revelation's Hammer - Buried As Filth
Kalmah - Windlake Tale
The Black Dahlia Murder - Control

Havok - Living Nightmare

Recap by The Metal Wulf

Birthdays are a sure guarantee of carnage and chaos on the Onslaught, with our long-suffering host Joe Wyatt being the most recent celebrant.
Joe had mentioned the previous week that he'd like a visit from Sloth for his birthday, and Sloth didn't disappoint. Of course, in addition to Sloth, Seriah Azkath, Arydaea Insanity, and JustJoe (from The Last Exit For The Lost) had also joined us for the evening. 
As a matter of fact, according to Azkath, Arydaea was supposed to emerge from a cake. Joe was unconvinced, however, insisting that the cake probably had Jeffie in it. Azkath countered with assurances that the cake was too small to have Jeffie in it...but in the end, that's exactly who was in it...
Odd, I would have sworn Jeffie NEVER would have fit inside that thing...yet, he did...sort of...
Truth is, he almost made it out of the cake before he got stuck...and I mean FIRMLY stuck. There was absolutely NO getting him out without a lot of effort on our part.
Which, in the long run, really felt like way too much trouble and energy to expend on his stupid ass, so we just relocated him to another room and let him fend for himself. Truth is, last time I saw him, he'd somehow repositioned himself in the cake so that only his feet were sticking out. I think he may have been trying to eat his way free.
He's fine, though, no worries! I'm almost positive he'll be back without needing to clone him again...

Thanks to Bill throwing me under the bus, word got back to Azkath that I had once again snuck in a cigarette. This led to an attack with the Pooh stick. That didn't sit well with me, because anybody who saw the last video segment to feature the Pooh stick knows where the thing had ended up. Yep, that same Pooh stick that Sloth violated himself with months ago on The Last Exit ended up getting shoved in my face, in and around my nose and mouth area, among other places that I'd rather not discuss.
Yeah, it was pretty bad... 
Further birthday shenanigans included a mouse trap toss. Literally, taking loaded mouse traps and tossing them at Sloth's tush. This eventually led to covering a portion of the floor in loaded mouse traps and tossing Sloth into them. 


May 4, 2013 - No Pants Day!

  • Published in 2013
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** Slayer Tribute **
Captor Of Sin
Die By The Sword
Hell Awaits
Raining Blood
War Ensemble
South Of Heaven
Silent Scream
War Zone
Hate Worldwide
Agressive Perfector
Angel Of Death
Masters Of Metal - Chameleon
The Resistance - To The Death
Pamela Moore - Paranoia
F.K.U. - Scream Bloody Mosher
M:Pire Of Evil - Blackened Are The Priests
Atrocity - Death By Metal
Ark Of The Covenant - Transgressors
Vicious Rumors - Electric Punishment
Orchid - Mountains Of Steel
Black Water Rising - Show No Mercy
Death Dealer - Hammer Down
Gary Clark Jr. - When My Train Pulls In
Amorphis - Enchanted By The Moon
Iron Glove - Heaven Hellbound
Suidakra - Let Me Put My Love Into You
Trail Of Tears - Path Of Destruction
The Monolith Deathcult - Drugs, Thugs & Machetes
Starkill - New Infernal Rebirth
Killswitch Engage - Time Will Not Remain
Potential Threat - Written In Blood
Horseface - Succubus (I Warned You!)
Ghost B.C. - Depth Of Satan's Eyes
Arsis - Choking On Sand
Anciients - Faith And Oath
Kings Destroy - The Toe
Kadaver - Rythm For Endless Minds
Sodom - Tracing The Victim
We As Human - Dead Man
Skid Row - Get Up
Ugly Kid Joe - No One Survives
Pamela Moore - Melt Into You
Avantasia - Dweller In A Dream
Pushmen - The Year Of Hands & Neck
Stygian - Bloodlines
Blood Ceremony - Witchwood
Kobra And The Lotus - No Rest For The Wicked
Recap by The Metal Wulf...

So, as per tradition, the night of the 3rd was our annual No Pants Day celebration (being the first Friday of the month). And, in all honesty, the first couple of hours were pretty uneventful in the sense that there was no uncomfortable silly occurrences, of the type we are all too well known for on this particular evening.
In fact, Joe attempted a save by suggesting that No Pants Day was over by the time the rest of the crew arrived (Jeffie, JustJoe, and Arydaea), mentioning how it was officially Saturday, and therefore May 4th, which is apparently now Official Star Wars Day (May The Fourth Be With You...)
But, Jeffie and JustJoe proclaimed it to be No Pants Day Weekend, so there was no avoiding it...
Before I get into any more detail regarding the horrors that befell later in the evening, I should mention that we devoted the first hour of the show to paying tribute to Slayer's Jeff Hanneman, who had sadly passed the day before. 
Those familiar with Hanneman's story know that he'd taken ill a couple year's ago, contracting necrotizing fasciitis, possibly from a spider bite. The official cause of death, as of recently, seems to be pointing to cirrhosis of the liver, however.
No matter, you can't prepare yourself for anything like this. I mean, come on, Hannaman was part of a major movement in heavy metal history, being part of the early thrash scene and helping to pave the way for a completely new genre of heavy music. His contributions to Slayer are practically limitless, including both music and lyrics, especially in the early years. He will be deeply and sorely missed...
So, moving along to the horrors of No Pants Day...
Okay, I confess, even I found myself to be highly creepy in the aftermath of the whole thing, when photos and video were being shared on Facebook. I mean, I even kept my shorts on this year, literally NO boxers and NO man-kini! 
Can't say the same for the shirt, though. 
So, yeah, in a nutshell, I put rainbow stickers around my nipples to act as Pasties, strapped on an inflatable unicorn horn, painted a mop head in rainbow hues (a HORRIBLE paint job, by the way...), and wore Jeffie's blonde wig (my head's been itchy every since...) in the interest of putting forth my ultimate personification of what a Brony would be. And I'm kinda ashamed of myself...
Of course, shame doesn't make it okay that at the end of the evening Jeffie and JustJoe beat me down and violated me with my own unicorn horn...and I'm pretty sure there was some sincere attempts at tea-bagging me at the very end...
And let's not forget Arydaea's assurances to the three of us that not only was there a No Pants Day bus outside waiting for us, but there was also a Brony bus, specifically for me.
We looked...long and hard...far and wide...there were no buses...

March 16, 2013 - Arydaea's Surprise Party

  • Published in 2013
Iron Maiden - Killers 
Iron Maiden - Hallowed Be Thy Name 
Gloryhammer - Angus McFife 
Saxon - Walking The Steel 
Anthrax - Big Eyes 
Clutch - The Wolf Man Kindly Requests... 
Cathedral - Tower Of Silence 
Gamma Ray - Empire Of The Undead 
Kvelertak - Trepan 
Witchburner - Possession 
Volbeat - Cape Of Our Hero 
Ken Mode - The Terror Pulse 
Adrenaline Mob - High Wire 
Ghost B.C. - Year Zero 
Intronaut - Milk Leg 
Rotting Christ - In Yumen-Xibalba 
Sanjuro Fields - Death's Umbrella 
Moss - The Bleeding Years 
Finntroll - Skogsdotter 
In Vain - To The Core 
Hope For The Dying - Reformation 
Hope For The Dying - Iniquitous 
Lordi - The Riff 
Sanjuro Fields - Smoking Cold Cigarettes 
Anthrax - Smokin' 
Robot Lords Of Tokyo - Keepers Of The Night 
Mama's Boys - Needle In The Groove 
Sanjuro Fields - Driver Included 
Mortillery - Evil Invaders 
Serenity - The Art Of War 
Legacy - Armored Forces 
This Is Hell - The Enforcer 
Head Of The Demon - Phantasmagoria 
Cathedral - Vengeance Of The Blind Dead 
Gamma Ray - Death Or Glory 
Clutch - Cyborg Bette 
Howl - Attrition 
Carnivore Diprosopus - Colossal Destruction 
Suffocation - Eminent Wrath 
Hatriot - Globicidal 
Tennessee Murder Club - Cyborg Deathbed 
Thin Lizzy - Emerald 
The Modern Age Slavery - Arise 
Mothership - Win Or Lose 
Soilwork - Leech 
Krokus - Hallelujah Rock N' Roll 
Toranaga - Sword Of Damocles 
Avenger Of Blood - Aggressive Psychotic Behavior 
Nick Hellfort - Fame Is Just A Whore 
Robot Lords Of Tokyo - Chicken Little
Recap by The Metal Wulf
Very likely the craziest night we'll have on the show all year. Of course, I'm not going to swear to that, because we've still got nine and a half months of craziness to get through.
Anyhoo, we'd been preparing for this particular evening for a number of weeks, as we wanted to do something special for Arydaea Insanity (the little lady who does most of the video recording for both the Metallic Onslaught as well as The Last Exit For The Lost), in honor of her birthday. This is actually the second time we've gotten a large number of her friends to converge on the same night. Two years ago we had met in Ithaca for an edition of The Last Exit, with all of us from the Onslaught showing up, as well as members of Zadoc...And The Nightmare!, and many others as well. It went over pretty well, so Azkath arranged another one for this year, this time at the Onslaught.
So, if you tuned in, you know things were pretty much out of control right from the starting gate. My vote for surreal moment of the evening was when Shoebox (of Worm Quartet fame) suggested we all randomly read the closest thing within reach, simultaneously.
There is video of this occurring, and it's pretty damned funny. Stay tuned!
In addition to Shoebox, we also saw the return of JustJoe, who's always good for his own brand of insanity, and there was also an appearance put in by Sloth, who we'd last seen on The Last Exit on their End Of The World show.
We'd also seen Sloth back in June when we celebrated Joe's birthday, the high point of that evening being a round of soccer with a ball constructed of barbed wire...
Cortland's Sanjuro Fields had also dropped in for Arydaea's birthday. Truth is, we'd tried to get them in the studio about a month earlier, on the same night that some of us were to go see Doro Pesch.
You'll recall that the weather that night put a damper on a LOT of people's plans...
(Fucking weather...*grumble grumble*...Doro...*grumble*... )
Anyway, Sanjuro Fields are pretty killer if you've never heard them or seen them live. Good high energy band with some catchy tunes, leaning a bit toward the punk end of the spectrum. Worth a listen, without a doubt, and you can find them right here on good ol' Facebook!
So, I'm not even going to attempt to recount everything that happened Friday night, it would be pointless. A lot of stuff got lost in the madness, and everything is pretty much a blur. All I can say is between photos and video, you can expect to see loads of madness and things done with balloons that...well, I'm pretty sure balloons weren't meant to be used in such a way...
So, things should return to some semblance of "normalcy" on the next edition of the show, when we'll be getting a visit from some of our Roc City Roller Derby friends. Most of the ladies haven't been out to see us in quite some time, so this should be pretty entertaining!

October 8, 2011 - Just Joe's Birthday

  • Published in 2011

Recap by The Metal Wulf;

So, if you were tuned in this week, you know that I was ousted from the show early. Somehow I ended up by the road with a For Free sign tied around my neck... Good thing Bill was passing by at around that time, 'cuz who the Hell knows where I may have ended up otherwise? Thanks a bunch, guys, I won't forget this one...

Anyhoo, I probably deserved it, considering I'd consumed some Zatarain's Red Beans and Rice before the show, and the results were a little worse than normal... (Worse meaning that Jeffie ended up comparing the smell to dead Sea Monkeys...25-year-dead Sea Monkeys, to be precise...) Okay, I'm kind of a gassy guy, and yeah, everybody's right, it doesn't seem to matter what I eat! Maybe I should just starve myself? Either that , or just accept things for what they are and just go for broke every week. Maybe I'll have a whole bunch of broccoli and taco dip before the next show! Mmmmm... (No worries, I'm not actually a big fan of broccoli...)

Anyway, from a music perspective, there was a bit of a mixed bag for some of us. I mean, Joe played "Mad Dog" by Anvil, a song I hadn't heard since the 80's. Seriously, the last time I'd heard that song was on Bob Appel's old show, The Rock Shop. The good old days... So, yeah, that was pretty awesome. However, Joe decided that we deserved to hear that Metallica/Lou Reed song again. Now, this collaboration has officially been dubbed LuLu...although, as much as I love Metallica (and I really do, don't get me wrong...), the majority of us on the Onslaught seem to think that the name should be changed to PuPu... Okay, the music itself really isn't terrible. It's mostly Lou Reed's involvement that turns this into a huge pile of shit, at least in my book. And face it, Lars' drumming in recent years hasn't been so great. Can't put my finger on it, but there is definitely something missing from his old sound...

Now, as if that weren't bad enough, he also tossed in some more Bulletboys from their recent cover album, as well as some Michael Schenker with Robin McCauley (a little lame, I'm sad to say, and I seem to remember that line-up of MSG actually being pretty good...), Five Finger Death Punch (hate 'em, just don't care for this band, never have...), and a truly awful track from Maylene and The Sons Of Disaster, a band that Joe actually liked an album or so ago. Oddly enough, the best song that came out of that Set Of Pain (as I have dubbed it...) was the Bulletboys track, a cover of Scorpions "Falling In Love". In fact, we all agreed that Bulletboys actually IMPROVED on the original. (Honestly, not that big of a feat, if you ask me, and I'm actually a fan of the Scorps...) Redemption for this set came a little later, as Joe played some Charred Walls Of The Damned, which features former Judas Priest vocalist Tim "Ripper" Owens, and was pretty freakin' good! He also backed that up with some classic Priest in the form of "Desert Plains", so the night really wasn't a complete bust!


June 18, 2011 - Joe's Birthday

  • Published in 2011

Joes BirthdayRecap by The Metal Wulf;
So, after the out of control insanity of last week, I figured we'd be hard pressed to follow that goofiness up for a second straight week. I was wrong, so terribly, terribly wrong... The Demon Azkath, Just Joe, and Foul Mouth Girl from The Last Exit For The Lost showed up to honor the birthday of our long-suffering host, Joe Wyatt. We celebrated by doing a variation of a Russian Roulette show. If you're familiar with The Last Exit, you know what I'm talking about. For those new to this concept, allow me to explain: In a traditional Russian Roulette show, "bullets" are chosen at random from a bag, but only when certain songs are played. These songs usually fall into the category of cheesy, overplayed stuff. Each "bullet" is actually a small slip of paper with a special action or activity printed on it. For example, if Joe had chosen the slip that said Just Joe Hugs Everybody, that's what would happen. And, as I recall, that did transpire. One of the more tolerable bullets, to be honest. Believe me, they can get pretty brutal... So, in this variation, Joe the birthday boy got to pick a random bullet during each talk break, and got to choose who got to perform the action written on that particular bullet. Much to Joe's dismay, one of the first bullets to be pulled said that Joe had to play Alice Cooper's "He's Back (The Man Behind The Mask)". Not one of Alice's most popular tracks on our show. Personally, I really don't mind it so much, but Joe can't stand it, so you can only imagine how that went over... But, in the end, the song was played, and Joe complained that his birthday was starting to suck. And things weren't about to get any better... The next bullet said "Randy Dances". Now, this was kind of tough, because anything with a danceable rhythm is kind of scarce on our show. However, I had a little brainstorm. There's an old classic rock song called "Black Betty" that never fails to get me moving, and thankfully Azkath had a version of it handy. Yes, that is what I danced to, and I'm thinking from here on in, that song's got to be my official dancing music. During my performance, it was suggested that I give out lap dances. Joe didn't seem very receptive, though, so I moved on to Will, Lindsey, Kasey, and Josh. Can't really say that what I was doing could best be described as a lap dance, though. More like random humping motions, in rhythm, of course. Overall, my efforts really weren't appreciated that much. Amd Joe's compaints continued... Things picked up on the next bullet. Funny thing is, Josh jumped at the chance to take one more the team when this bullet, which was called "Through The Board", was drawn. A large, and moderately thin, board was placed on the floor, held up by two cinder blocks. It was then debated as to who was going to go through the board, and how they were going to go through. After much deliberation it was decided that Azkath would actually be the one to go through. Further deliberation ensued as to HOW he would go through... Approximately five minutes later, it was finally decided that Rick and I would do a double chokeslam on Azkath. It went pretty well, all told. I mean, Azkath was able to still talk and walk about afterward, so I guess he must have been okay. Will was the subject of the next bullet, entitled "Hammer Smashed Face". Will had to lie on the floor, holding a Mac Book in front of his face. Azkath then took a VERY large hammer (and when I say large, imagine Viking weaponry...), and proceeded to smash the Mac Book over Will's face. Eventually the book was just left on the floor to be abused as we passed the hammer from person to person. I honestly thought we were going to lose Josh to a full-blown Viking Berserker Rage, and even I started to enjoy swinging that thing just a little too much. Let's face it, Azkath's got some REEEEAAAALLLLY cool toys at his disposal! Joe's birthday present from Azkath was finally revealed, much to the dismay of all. Yes, I regret to inform the Metallic Onslaught listening community that a brand new Jeffie has been created and unleashed on our show. It was all good though, because the newest Jeffie made the perfect subject for the next bullet, which was entitled "DVD Player To The Head". Now, it was around this time that an old guest of ours decided to pop in unexpectedly. UWF wrestler, Jay Flyer, showed up with his security staff, and it was actually Jay's head of security who got to swing the DVD player at Jeffie's skull. It didn't take long for the real carnage to happen. We ended up with a full-on Onslaught/Security staff brawl, and once the smoke cleared, I found myself holding that monstrous hammer, and wearing that goofy viking helmet that keeps popping up in my vicinity. Oh, have I mentioned that it seems this new "personality" is called Olaf? Go figure... Next bullet: Hugs! Yes, Just Joe made his rounds, accompanied by Jeffie, hugging everybody in their paths. To be honest, this was kind of a breath of fresh air, following everything else. Speaking of fresh, Josh got the opportunity to freshen up Just Joe, because the next bullet requred that Just Joe be bathed. Not sure how that went for Josh. I mean, there IS a shower upstairs, and the two of them went up together, and Just Joe DID come back in his boxers, and with wet hair, so.... I'm guessing it was a success? Time flies when your having fun, as the saying goes, and the final bullet of the evening once again fell on Just Joe. This one was called "Basement Time", and it was with the promise of cake that Just Joe was lured inside the door behind the basement. He was promptly shut in and told to be careful of the spiders... I really can't blame Just Joe for screaming like a little red-haired girl with skinned knees. I don't particlularly care for spiders either, which probably explains my own screams when he came out of the basement and started hugging me, allowing the spiders to leave his body and crawl all over mine... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!! And so, it was on that note that Joe's birthday celebration for this year came to a close, meaning this will probably be the last time we experience the Russian Roulette fun for at least another, oh, seven weeks or so, when Bill's birthday rolls around!


May 7, 2011 - No Pants Day!!!

  • Published in 2011

The HorrorRecap by Randy, aka Wulfie, who is really, REEEEAAAALLLLLY sorry... 
(Truly, you have no idea...)

Seeing as how this edition was our annual celebration of No Pants Day, I'm going to break this recap into two parts. Serious  (yeah, believe it or not, amidst the chaos there was time for such a thing!) and Seriously Fucked Up...

Part 1. Serious

So, an early discussion centered around an upcoming release from King Kobra, their first new music in many years. This next disc is going to feature Paul Shortino (formerly of Rough Cutt) on vocals, replacing Mark Free, known these days as Marcie Free, after undergoing a sex change. (No disrespect meant, just statin' the facts.) Actually, there's an amusing parallel between both bands. Both had very strong releases for their debut albums (King Kobra had "Ready To Strike" while Rough Cutt's was self-titled), and both had really, REEEEAAAALLLY disappointing follow-up albums ("Rough Cutt Wants You" and King Kobra's "Thrill Of A Lifetime"). Now, Mark Free sounded damned good on "Ready To Strike", and their single, "Hunger", has been a personal favorite of mine for many years, but I got to see Rough Cutt when they opened for Dio back in 1985, and I can personally assure you that Paul Shortino has got some of the best pipes in the business, live or otherwise. Yet Joe seemed to be implying that he preferred Mark Free, and that's quite alright. I quite enjoyed that little bit of banter, and wish we had time for more discussions along those lines. So, later on, somewhere in the random chaos that is No Pants Day, we had time to have a few words with Joe Lupia, who had last joined us in the studio while he was a member of Amelia Is Dead, sadly a now-defunct outfit. Still, Joe remains busy and was more than happy to share some news about his current project, God Astray, and we were more than happy to play some tracks! Of course, there was also the discussion of whether or not Jeffie would show. Azkath had flatly refused to show up on No Pants Day, and really, who can blame the guy? So, yeah, the debate was on, and sure enough, Jeffie showed up, bringing us to...

Part 2: Seriously Fucked Up

Yes, believe it or not, Jeffie had arrived, defying all logic. I mean, the guy is supposed to be dead as a doornail, after all, killed by my hand, torn asunder, shredded into bloody chunks of flesh and grosser things... But, it seems this is a DIFFERENT Jeffie... Okay, since when is there more than one Jeffie active at a given time? After I killed what I thought was the last Jeffie, Azkath INSISTED that he wouldn't make any more, so where in the Nine Frickin' Hells did this one come from? I mean, apparently it's been traveling through time, but did it exist before or after I killed what I thought was the final Jeffie? So many questions, and no real answers forthcoming. And of course, he'll be back... Dammit... Just Joe and Foul Mouth Girl were both on hand. Wouldn't be No Pants Day without either of them, and we hadn't had FMG in studio in a few weeks. We miss her when she's not there. Just Joe was sporting layers of underwear, sort of a throwback to FMG last year, and far less alluring, I must say. Hey, for my part I was sporting a pair of black cut-offs, perfectly within the domain of No Pants Day reason. Bill was in his boxers AND a bath robe, Will (Shades) was in a pair of tuxedo boxers, and Lindsey was in a little black nightie, very cute, and perfectly acceptable. Of course, carnage ensued very quickly. Befiore I knew it, and at Joe's suggestion, I was subjected to the indignity of a Bronco Buster from Just Joe, with a little help from Jeffie. I wasn't overly thrilled by the prospect of having somebody's (ANYBODY'S...) package that close to my face, so it was a mentally painful moment. At some point, Jeffie and Just Joe thought I should give our long-suffering host, Joe Wyatt, a Rikishi-style Stink Face to make up for him suggesting the Bronco Buster. So, I stripped down to my my AC/DC boxers. As it turned out, it was Jeffie and Just Joe on the receiving end of their own respective Stink Faces, and I've gotta tell ya, THAT WAS FUN!!! I made sure they got a good idea of what I'd had for dinner the night before, you'd best believe it! I'll bet their still gargling! So, from there, Jeffie carried out this big suitcase that was full of women's underwear. FMG seemed to think some of it looked pretty familiar, and one pair in particular I recognized from last year. These were all going on Jeffie's head, much to FMG's dismay. As a matter of fact, she showed Jeffie just how dismayed she was when she proceeded to beat the piss out of him. We, of course, cheered her on. Things got a little hazy for me following this. I remember Jeffie attacking me with wooden boards, resulting in more head trauma. Next thing I knew, I was wearing a viking helmet, as well as carrying a plastic sword and shield. Apparently some very bad things had happened up until that point, but I couldn't remember a damned thing. There was a lot of in and out of coherence from there, and each time I came back to myself, I either had the helmet on, or the sword and shieid, or some combination thereof. Chaos doesn't even describe it, to be honest... It wasn't until the evening was over and I'd gotten home that I discovered the truly nasty nature of the evenings most disturbing event. Upon watching what was saved to YouTube via the web cam, I saw myself run around in nothing but a pair of bikini briefs, wearing the helmet, carrying the sword and shiield, and attacking both Jeffie and Just Joe as I screamed like a maniac... Sincerely, my apologies to all who may have (let's face it, PROBABLY) suffered any undue mental distress as a result of viewing any of that. Look on the bright side, I really don't see how next year's No Pants Day celebration could be worse...

Pentagram - 8
Midnattsol - Spellbound
CypherSeer - From The Womb

Anvil - New Orleans Voo Doo
Cavalera Conspiracy - Blunt Force Trauma
Black 'N Blue - Candy
The Rods - Rebels Highway
Saviour - Killing Fields

Within Temptation - In The Middle Of The Night
Leaves' Eyes - Spirit's Masquerade
The Gates Of Slumber - Wretch
Here Comes The Kraken - Beverly Hell
Motherboar - Croctosquatch

Septic Flesh - Five-Pointed Star
Gates Of Slumber - Bastards Born
Red Fang - The Undertow
Kaapora - Existence And Sickness
Hope For The Dying - Perpetual Ruin

God Astray - Dark Grey
Tyr - Take Your Tyrant
Infant Sorrow - Furry Walls
Alestorm - Miget Saw
Nine Round - Lost In The Fold

The May 4th Massacre - Flag Of Separation
I.N.C. - Swallowed
Before The Dawn - Winter Within
While Heaven Wept - Saturn And Sacrifice
Deceased - Kindred Assembly
Combat - The Mutant Inside

Orange Barrel Acid - Useless
Arkona - Skal
Villian - Kamikaze
Pestilence - Malignant
Ana Kefr - Parasites
Tokyo Blade - Night Of The Blade
Diamond Head - Helpless

God Astray - Sex Poison
Hate Eternal - Hatesworn
Lowkey - Passion
Venom - Black Metal
Grave Decent - Morbid Extraction
OTEP - Fists Fall

Genitortures - Sin City
New Lows - Last Of The Rats
The Exalted PileDriver - Witch Hunt
Here Comes The Kraken - Nu Beginning
Cause For Revelation - Another Failure
Becoming The Archetype - The Magnetic Sky

The Rods - The Code
Thinning The Herd - Chill In The Air
Septic Flesh - The Undead Keep Dreaming


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