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Recap by The Metal Wulf; You never really WANT to have that moment come when you devote a portion of a radio show to the memory of one of your heroes. When it all boils down, you really just want to be selfish and go on wishing that the person in question never passed on, never had his voice forever silenced, and will still be around to continue making contributions to the music you love.
But, the reality is that Ronnie James Dio has forever left us, and that beautiful voice of his, which could go from angelic to demonic in the blink of an eye, has been silenced. There will be no more trips to the magical and sometimes frightening worlds he introduced us to in his songs.
With that being said, I'm sure we probably didn't feature the greatest tribute likely to be done in Ronnie's honor, but I'd say it was probably up there among the most heart-felt and genuine, as each and every one of us on The Metallic Onslaught know full well what Ronnie contributed to our kind of music over the years, be it with Elf, Rainbow, Black Sabbath, Dio, or Heaven And Hell.
Truth be known, each and every one of those bands was featured in our tribute, that ran slightly over the one-hour time slot that was originally planned for it. Not that any of us complained. Hell, given the opportunity, I'm sure we would've been more than happy to just keep going with it right up until the end of the show.
Ronnie, wherever you may be now, we're all going to miss you terribly. Rest In Peace!

Above and beyond that, we had Dave from Spater join us once again for some more promotion of the Finger Lakes Metal Fest, being held next weekend in Clyde! Seriously, this 2-day event has an extremely solid line-up, and shouldn't be missed if you can at all possibly avoid it!
We also had members of Lowkey on hand, who will actually be performing at the Metal Fest next week. In addition to that appearance, the boys have been hard at work on a new album. If you've been listening in recent weeks, you may have heard one of their new tracks, "Porcupine Cannonball", and in addition to that, they also provided us with another new track called "Passion". Sounded pretty damned good to me!

Jeffie was once again on hand, and he seemed a little confused in the early goings of his visit. Seems he woke up in a hole after last weeks show, which saw him getting into some mushrooms I'd gathered earlier in the day.
I actually thanked him for testing them for me. Considering the after-effects, I don't think I would've enjoyed those on a pizza...
I'd remarked to him that the last time I'd seen him, he was sitting on the roof of the station. He didn't seem to remember getting up there.
I swear, I honestly don't know how he got up there! I had nothing to do with it!
Heh heh heh...
Anyhow, he started rambling about being chased by a walrus and ending up in a hole. And then looking up from the hole to look into the starlight, where God revealed his plans for the Onslaught to him.
Riiiiiiight...
He later mentioned that he couldn't tell us God's plan until we sacrificed Josh. At first, I was a little hesitant. I mean, normally if anyone dies on the show, it's a Jeffie, and we haven't had a Jeffie death in, well...I honestly think the last one was the week before I made my first appearance!
Even then, he showed up as a zombie, and eventually another Jeffie was cloned anyway...
Seriously, you can't get rid of Jeffie forever. Azkath just keeps sending us more of them...
Anyhoo, back to God's plan.
In the long run, I decided that sometimes, in the interest of having your destiny revealed, a little bloodshed may just be a tad necessary.
So, in the closing moments of the show, in a bestial rage, I killed Josh on the air.
Sorry Josh, but God has a plan for us all!

Listen to the Show - Pictures

Recap by The Metal Wulf: Well, last night was about plowing on ahead and putting No Pants Day behind us. Unfortunately, I don't think anyone reminded Jeffie that it was over, as we were periodically subjected to his pants falling down throughout the evening...
Jeffie, Jeffie, Jeffie, what are we gonna do with you?

So, we had Joe Marro back in the studio last night, along with a couple of his bandmates from Paradyme, bass player Derek Schwarzkopf and keyboardist/vocalist John Walsh. They were not only kind enough to provide a couple of demos to play on the show, but they also plugged in for a little in-studio jam session. Things seem to be gelling very well for these guys, and we're all looking forward to seeing what else they have in store in the coming months!
Gotta say I'm getting a little concerned about Mr. Marro's state of mind, though, as I'm pretty sure we all heard him state at some point in the evening that he wanted to marry Jeffie...
Funny side note to that: My girlfriend told me today that she thought it was ME who made that remark about marrying Jeffie.
EWWWWW!



I must say, having the guys in the studio with their instruments added a little extra atmosphere to the show. John even gave a little musical accompaniment to Jeffie's reading of the concert listings.
Then there was Joe Marro and his impersonation of ummmm...
Shit, what's that guys name?
Hmmmm...one of those really unique voices, ya used to hear him all the time in movie ads and television ads...
Well, just think "In a world where werewolves rule the airwaves...", and you'll know who I mean!
Yeah, Joe did a great impersonation of that guy, prompting Foul Mouth Girl to construct a Mad Lib for him to read, using that voice, with some dramatic keyboard music thrown in. Kind of a surreal moment, but worth a chuckle!

Things got pretty goofy in the latter portions of the show. Jeffie started acting more unusual than normal, and said something about taking something he found in my bag. Took me a moment to think about that one, but I realized what he must have been referring to, and I responded with something to the effect of, "You took THOSE?"
Jeffie referred to them as Goof Balls, and that certainly seems to be a reflection of what they were doing to him.
Seriously, I thought those mushrooms were perfectly safe! Thought they'd be good on a pizza!
I guess I have Jeffie to thank for testing them out, 'cuz we now know that they probably weren't very healthy in the long run. He started to hallucinate heavily, at one point thinking Josh had turned into an elf and asking him to jump into his hand.
On top of that, he thought that I had turned into a regular man! Can you imagine that? Yep, they seemed to be pretty potent. I shudder to think of what happened to poor Jeffie after the show was over...

Listen to the Show - Pics
Download The No Pants Day Song!

Recap by The Metal Wulf: Okay, it's a wrap. My very first celebration of No Pants Day on The Metallic Onslaught is officially done and over, so any feelings of unrest and overwhelming discomfort can get shelved.
Until next year, anyway...

We had quite the gathering this year, too. Karma-Lized from Roc City Roller Derby joined us with a few of the girls, specifically Ja-Boodie, Mia Malicious, and Camaraderie. We were more than happy to give them some time to introduce themselves, discuss how they got into Roller Derby, and promote their season opener.

Wrestler's Dewey Murray, aka The Man Of 1,000 Gimmicks and "Super Bad" Richard Venice also joined us once again. They took full advantage of No Pants Day by donning their wrestling tights, and decided to promote an upcoming Rochester show with me sandwiched firmly between them.
I was told this was one of the funnier moments of the show. Let's put it this way, they were mentioning certain ECW wrestlers appearing at this event, and it was a little awkward hearing the name Balls Mahoney mentioned considering the close proximity of, well...I'm sure you can understand why I pleaded, "Don't say balls!!!"

Jeffie was on hand, along with Foul Mouth Girl and Just Joe from The Last Exit For The Lost. I gotta say, they were certainly in the No Pants Day spirit. Jeffie in his boxers, Just Joe in his boxers, and FMG in layers of undergarments.
Okay, so I really can't complain about FMG in her undies, but she pulled a slightly mean little trick on us. At the top of each hour she removed one layer of undies, and said she'd remove the last layer at midnight.
But, when midnight arrived she announced that No Pants Day was over, and promptly put her pants back on...
We are ALL such suckers...

The night had more than it's fair share of carnage, with Just Joe becoming an early casualty as he fell victim to an attack from Joe. Jeffie certainly took his lumps as well, as he and Just Joe each took turns getting wrestling chops not only from Dewey and Super Bad, but from Karma and Mia as well.
Actually, I'd have to say that Mia's chop was probably the loudest and sounded the most painful. It also left the reddest handprint on Just Joe's chest...

Josh had actually decided to protest No Pants Day by wearing jeans, and claiming that he had grown denim skin didn't convince anybody. Before the night was over, he was separated from his jeans courtesy of Karma, Mia, and Camaraderie.
Of course, Josh somehow didn't seem to object too much, and was grinning blissfully as the girls got him down to his boxers...

I took my share of abuse as well. In addition to being sandwiched between Dewey and "Super Bad", I ended up with both Jeffie and Just Joe in my lap throughout the evening. And Jeffie seemed to feel a need to fondle my man-boobs (yes, I'm a big guy, I have them...), which I think I tolerated with at least some semblance of grace, if not a complete lack of panic...

Cthulhu also decided to drop in for a brief visit.
Funny thing, one moment I'm fine, next there's a clap of thunder from outside and I've got this green squid-like thing attached to my wrist...
You know things have gotta be bad when you've officially traumatized an Elder God. When you've made a Great Old One shudder in horror, I imagine you must have been involved in something pretty distasteful, and Cthulhu made it very clear to us that we were ALL out of our minds!
Seriously, here's a being that's been awoken from eons of slumber, thinking it's time to bring his own brand of madness into the world and to do his part to spread chaos, and when he thinks the time has finally come...
...he discovers that it's already too late and the world is officially a lost cause...
I'm sure our little green buddy will be fine, though. Of course, he didn't take too well to the impostor that Just Joe had in his possession. Kind of a "Will the real Cthulhu please stand up" moment. Should look fun on the video!

Outside of some confusion over whether or not I'm a real wolf (seriously, how could anyone possibly think otherwise...), that pretty much covers all the No Pants Day bases. Things should be back to a relatively normal scope next week!
Not that we ever really have a "normal" show, that is...







And the Time Lapse Version of the whole night...

Listen to the Show

Recap by The Metal Wulf:  All in all, a relatively laid-back show. Originally we were supposed to feature UW's Kriptic Keegan, but hey, sometimes things don't quite pan out. No hard feelings!
We did, however, get another visit from James Allan from Children Of The New Sun who'd dropped in to promote their show last night in Rochester, not to mention Dave from Spater once again, who was on hand to further promote Finger Lakes Metal Fest this Memorial Day Weekend, May 29th and 30th.

We also had a visit from UW's Jay Flyier, who's been great about dropping in on the night before events, and we enjoy having him on. We're gonna miss him when he takes off for a few months. Seems he's got himself a chance to train for something bigger, and I can't say I can blame him. We definitely will be wishing him the best of luck!

Outside of that, the main theme of the evening seemed to be the cloud of dread that permeated the studio as we discussed next weeks' No Pants Day show.

Here's the deal with No Pants Day, an event I have yet to experience first hand, although I have seen and occasionally shared the video from last year's fiasco...
Not sure where the trend started, it may be a college thing, but somehow the first Friday of May has, somewhere along the line, been deemed No Pants Day. No pants means just that. Guys can wear shorts, girls can wear shorts or dresses or skirts and such.
Now for The Metallic Onslaught twist...
Some folks may start out in shorts, but will generally end up in their boxers, or briefs, or what have you.
Bear in mind this is a male-heavy show, although Foul Mouth Girl has taken part, and hey, that's not necessarily a bad thing!
But then you've also got Jeffie, and members of the Last Exit For The Lost Crew like Just Joe and Dave (and his alter ego Super Dave). In their boxers...
Trying to give folks lap dances...
You see where the comfort level can somewhat diminish, while raising the bar for the show's silliness.
Yep, one of the biggest shows of the year, and it's the one that everybody seems to dread!
And good ol' Wulfie's gonna be right in the thick of it...